10 Common Reasons For Divorce
It’s no secret that marriage is hard. While it’s easier for some couples than others, every couple has their own unique challenges, hangups, and obstacles.
When problems arise, some marriages are able to weather the storm, and others, sadly, fall apart. Reasons for divorce can be singular or many, but every spouse has their own breaking point where “I do” becomes “I don’t” and the marriage is over.
While the most common reasons for divorce may not be surprising, they’re common for a reason: Most couples will face one or more of the issues mentioned below at some point in their marriage. Whether or not the marriage continues, or ends in divorce, is up to the couple to decide.
The ten most common reasons for divorce are:
Taking the top spot in the most common reasons for divorce is infidelity. When one or both spouses cheat on the other, it’s very hard for the marriage to recover.
While infidelity can be caused by many things–anger, resentment, different sexual appetites, loneliness–it’s almost always devastating to the marriage.
When spouses have very different ideas about money, whether it’s spending habits, differences in income, or diverging financial goals, it can put a huge strain on the marriage.
If one spouse loses their job, or decides to stop working, it can severely impact the marriage and is often the tipping point that sends a couple down the road to divorce.
3) Poor/No Communication
Communication is crucial in marriage and not being able to communicate effectively quickly leads to resentment and frustration for both, impacting all aspects of a marriage.
Yelling at your spouse, not talking enough throughout the day, making nasty comments to express yourself are all unhealthy methods of communication that need to be eliminated for a marriage to succeed.
4) Endless Arguments
From bickering about chores to arguing about the kids; incessant arguing kills many relationships. Couples who seem to keep having the same argument over again often do so because they feel they’re not being heard or appreciated. Many find it hard to see the other person’s point of view, which leads to a lot of arguments without ever coming to a resolution.
5) Physical Appearance/Weight Gain
While it may seem superficial and unfair, dramatic changes in physical appearance–the most common is weight gain–usually have a negative impact on the marriage.
If one spouse gains a lot of weight, it can lead to a lack of self esteem for that spouse, and a lack of physical attraction for their partner. While some couples find ways to overcome this particular challenge, divorce is also a common result.
6) Unrealistic Expectations
Unrealistic expectations is one of the reasons for divorce most typically associated with young couples (early and mid twenties). It’s very common for one or both partners to have built up a fantasy of marriage in their minds, only to have their expectations shattered when reality kicks in and the honeymoon is over.
A successful marriage takes a lot of work and needs constant maintenance and attention. Those who ignore this aspect of their relationship do not last long.
7) Lack Of Intimacy
Not feeling connected to your partner can quickly ruin a marriage because it leaves couples feeling as though they’re living with a stranger or more like roommates than spouses. This can be from a lack of physical or emotional intimacy and isn’t always about sex.
Those that constantly giver their spouse the cold shoulder, should be aware that that kind of behavior is the fast lane for ending a marriage.
When one partner feels that they take on more responsibility in the marriage, it can alter their view of the other person and lead to resentment.
Every couple must find their own balance and their own way of living together as two equals who enjoy a respectful, harmonious, and happy relationship.
Being unprepared for marriage is similar but different from having unrealistic expectations. Statistically, almost half of all divorces occur within the first ten years of marriage, with years four through eight being especially common times when divorce happens.
Clear communication, continued intimacy, and respect for each other are all ways to help overcome sudden changes and problems that may arise.
10) Mental And/Or Physical Abuse
Of all the reasons for divorce, mental and/or physical abuse should raise the biggest red flag for both spouses. Abuse of any kind should not be swept under the rug or excused for any particular reasons or circumstances.
If a spouse is abusive, the victim needs to make every effort to get away from the abuser and end the relationship as quickly as possible. Click here for more information about how domestic violence affects a marriage and what to do about it.
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